Tag Archives: dates

Why You Gotta Be So MEAN?

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Why you gotta be so MEAN?

One of my clients is the nicest woman I know. In fact, she defines herself by her generosity toward her friends and family. So I was SHOCKED when she told me that she was MEAN to ex-boyfriend during their break-up. She insulted him, put him own, and basically treated him like crap.

WHY?

She explained that he would be devastated if he got dumped, so she just couldn’t do it. Instead, she figured she just  “show him” how much the relationship wasn’t working by being, ya know, mean. In time, he would figure it out and break up with her.

Logical, right? UH, WRONG.

That’s just mean.

Being mean isn’t doing anyone any favors. No matter how sad, upsetting, or devastating a break-up feels, communicating honestly and intimately is the kindest thing you can do.

What do you think? Let me know in the comments–have you ever acted mean to get someone else to dump you? OR, have you been honest, intimate and connected even through a break up? 

TIll I see you soon, take good care of your sweet heart.

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Do You Have the Power?

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Here’s a riddle: What do Finance, Yoga, and Dating have in common? Well, let’s consider who’s got the most POWER.

1) On the Trading Floor, who’s got it? The junior associate swinging the baseball bat and talking loudly to his friends in the next cubicle? OR the woman in the corner office, who doesn’t have to raise her voice. Just hearing her Manolo’s clank down the hall is enough to make everyone sit up straiter in their chair.

2) In the Yoga Studio, who’s got it? The dude who’s breathing heavily and loudly, who jumps and lands on his mat with a thump and a grunt? OR the lithe dancer who seemingly moves in slow motion so that every jump lands without a single sound?

3) In the Bar, who’s got it? The woman who enters the room with a splash, says hello to everyone and immediately kisses the bartender on each cheek? OR is it the woman who steps into the bar, pauses silently to survey the scene allowing each and every man and woman to see her, and fills the room with her presence without saying a thing?

OK–did you figure out? What do Finance, Yoga, and Dating have in common?

Answer: The person with the most quiet confidence has the power!

OK, so how do you get that confidence? Well, it’s a practice like anything else. But keep in mind, you don’t have to do a whole song and dance to convince people that you’re powerful. Just believe it. And everyone around you will too.

Watch it here:

What do you think? Is quiet confidence the key to power? What about your life? Tell is in the comments section below: Do YOU have the power? I can’t wait to hear your answers!

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Do You Feel Like an Insecure Little Girl?

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I know you’re a strong powerful woman–at work, in the gym, with all your relationships with your friends and family.

But what happens when it comes to dating? Do you become an insecure little girl? That’s what a new client told me. She’s totally together and confident in every area of her life. But then when she gets around men she likes–BOOM–she becomes tongue-tied toddler! What gives? She doesn’t feel like herself but she doesn’t know what to do!

Well, she (and many other women like her) made the mistake of compartmentalizing her life. That is, she keeps her work life separate from her spiritual life, which is separate from her friend and family life, which of course, is also separate from her love life.

So she gets better at what she’s already good at–work and creating deep friendships. But she totally neglects what she’s less good at, like flirting. And so when she’s around a man she thinks is cute, she feels like an insecure little girl. Not a good scene.

What to do? Consider your life as a full package, not a collection of parts. That is, your work, spiritual, friendships and of course LOVE life are all part of the same being–YOU! And YOU dear, are a big girl who deserves the best. Remember that! And maybe next time you’re flirting with a guy, you’ll feel like the powerful love the machine that you are!

Deal?

What do you think? Have you ever felt like a little girl in one area of your life, and a strong woman in the other? Let me know in the comments, I can’t wait to hear!

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