Tag Archives: dealing with your ex

Why You Gotta Be So MEAN?

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Why you gotta be so MEAN?

One of my clients is the nicest woman I know. In fact, she defines herself by her generosity toward her friends and family. So I was SHOCKED when she told me that she was MEAN to ex-boyfriend during their break-up. She insulted him, put him own, and basically treated him like crap.


She explained that he would be devastated if he got dumped, so she just couldn’t do it. Instead, she figured she just  “show him” how much the relationship wasn’t working by being, ya know, mean. In time, he would figure it out and break up with her.

Logical, right? UH, WRONG.

That’s just mean.

Being mean isn’t doing anyone any favors. No matter how sad, upsetting, or devastating a break-up feels, communicating honestly and intimately is the kindest thing you can do.

What do you think? Let me know in the comments–have you ever acted mean to get someone else to dump you? OR, have you been honest, intimate and connected even through a break up? 

TIll I see you soon, take good care of your sweet heart.



The DO’s and DON’TS of Booty Calls

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OK, it’s the holiday season. Maybe you don’t exactly have a one-and-only, but you’ve still got that ex-flame that you kinda-sorta keep in touch with. And even though it didn’t work out long-term, you still think he’s a nice guy. And let’s be honest, it’s sort of a sure thing.

That’s what a client told me as she was trying to decide if it was a good idea to call him for a booty call.

“It would be fun, and I’d get my sexy playful juices flowing! Right?”

Well, not exactly. Yes, having a fun night is a great thing, no matter where it goes. But having it with your ex-flame? That can get a little confusing. Why risk getting attached, falling for him all over again, or most importantly, possibly weakening your own self-confidence and credibility. After all, you had a conversation with this guy about how you didn’t want to be with him. So stick to it, woman!


DO step away from the phone. Instead, go and sit your cute tushy on any bar stool. And know that if you wanted to, you could get laid tonight. You’ve still got it! And if you want it, it’s yours. I know, I know, maybe one night stands aren’t your thing. But just knowing it’s possible is sometimes all you need to get the fun, sexy feelings you were going for all along.

Come on over to the blog and join the conversation. Leave a comment–Have you ever called an ex-flame for a booty call? What happened? Was it fun and light, or intense and not quite worth the trouble? Let me know!

Till I see you soon in the comments, take good care of your sweet heart.



Your Ex is Dating Someone New: 3 Tips on How to Deal

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Has this ever happened to you?:

You and your ex-boyfriend break up, and you’re devastated.

But then you go to yoga class, and you start to feel better.

You talk to your girlfriends and you remember all the times he disappointed you. Strangely, you feel even better.

A sexy guy flirts with you, and you actually feel good.


You see your ex-boyfriend getting Sunday morning coffee with another woman–and BAM!–you’re right back in that devastated place.

I’ve been there. If you have too, this episode of BDG.TV is for you. In it, I discuss 3 tips on how to deal when your ex dates someone else.

Tell me about your experiences–how did YOU deal when your ex started dating someone else? What did you do? How did you feel? Let me know in the comments section!