Tag Archives: Ready to Date

Too Fat to Date

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Spring has sprung! And to get ready for the warmer months I’ve decided to enroll in a six-week challenge at my gym. (Yes, I got to the gym!) The challenge is simple–attend as many classes as you can (both strength and cardio) and measure your change in body fat percentage. I’m pretty excited to get my heart pumping!

I asked one of the challengers what motivated her most, and she bluntly said, “I’m too fat to date. I want to get in better shape before I start dating again.”

WHAT??!!! Too fat too date?!

But she got me thinking–is there an ideal weight, fitness level, or body fat percentage that makes you “ready?” The answer is a Big Fat NO.

What matters most is body confidence, not your body weight. If you’re feeling strong, healthy, and moving toward your optimum form, then you’re gonna feel fantastic! Working out and taking control of your health builds confidence. And when you’re confident, men notice.

On the other hand, if you’re not feeling confident–heavy, bloated, uncomfortable in your own skin–it doesn’t matter what the scale says. It doesn’t matter if your friends tell you that you look great. If you’re not feeling confident in your body than no one’s going to ask you out. Simple as that.

So please, by all means work out, take a yoga class, a zumba class, or go for a long walk! Start building your body confidence, and you’ll become sexy and attractive no matter what your weight!

What do YOU think? Have you ever felt too fat to date? Let me know in the comments section. Can’t wait to hear your thoughts.

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Do You Feel Like an Insecure Little Girl?

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I know you’re a strong powerful woman–at work, in the gym, with all your relationships with your friends and family.

But what happens when it comes to dating? Do you become an insecure little girl? That’s what a new client told me. She’s totally together and confident in every area of her life. But then when she gets around men she likes–BOOM–she becomes tongue-tied toddler! What gives? She doesn’t feel like herself but she doesn’t know what to do!

Well, she (and many other women like her) made the mistake of compartmentalizing her life. That is, she keeps her work life separate from her spiritual life, which is separate from her friend and family life, which of course, is also separate from her love life.

So she gets better at what she’s already good at–work and creating deep friendships. But she totally neglects what she’s less good at, like flirting. And so when she’s around a man she thinks is cute, she feels like an insecure little girl. Not a good scene.

What to do? Consider your life as a full package, not a collection of parts. That is, your work, spiritual, friendships and of course LOVE life are all part of the same being–YOU! And YOU dear, are a big girl who deserves the best. Remember that! And maybe next time you’re flirting with a guy, you’ll feel like the powerful love the machine that you are!

Deal?

What do you think? Have you ever felt like a little girl in one area of your life, and a strong woman in the other? Let me know in the comments, I can’t wait to hear!

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The 3 Date Rule, explained

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In last week’s episode of BDG.TV we talked about body issues, and how they can affect your dating. You heard about a woman who felt insecure about her own body, and judged a perfectly good man as “not being able to run a marathon” (true story!).

I suggested in the comments section that if this woman, or anyone for that matter, finds herself veering into “judge-y” territory about a man’s appearance, she apply The 3 Date Rule.

The 3 Date Rule: If you’re judging, commit to two more dates as long as he’s a nice guy.

BUT, how can you tell if he’s a nice guy? In the video, I offer three ways to figure it out. Maybe there are more? What do YOU think of the 3 Date Rule? How do you tell if someone’s a “nice guy?” Let me know in the comments section!

 

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